Art by Louis K. Stone
My mind is full… I close my eyes for calm, and within few seconds, I notice a barrage of thoughts flowing through my mind. I take long, deep breaths and bring my awareness to the present. The rapid flow of thoughts begins to slow down, but doesn’t come to a halt. I also notice that my thoughts don’t have a logical flow to them. They seem random, having no logical correlation. But, it is also thoughts that I am writing down on this piece of paper (this was originally handwritten on paper).
Contrary to the random thoughts I observed earlier, these thoughts have an almost perfect structure, logical flow and rhythm to them. They have a strong direction. Here, I stop for a moment and reflect: what are these two seemingly opposite sides to thought? One is random while the other is arranged in a logical and rhythmic pattern. While I reflect and write this article, these thoughts constitute my reflection and give it direction.
So, what gives thought direction? I think there is only one logical and rational answer to my question — it is my mind that gives my thought the content and direction that makes them uniquely mine. My mind superimposes itself onto my thoughts and brings about, what I shall call, conscious awareness to them.
But what, I think, is happening when random thoughts fly through the horizon of my mind? Why are they random? Why is there no rhythm to them? Why is there no direction? I sit still for a moment, moving my pen in my hand, trying to conjure up an answer from the sea of unconscious thoughts. Yes, that’s the definition I have decided to give this part of my mind — a sea of unconscious thoughts, passing through it at any given moment in time.
It is when I consciously try to seek an answer that my mind supplies it. How does this happen? How does the answer come to me? I don’t have a definite answer to this, and I’m not well read in psychology or psychiatry so I can’t use medial or scientific language — the only answer that makes sense to me is that in the moment I act and consciously try to conjure up an answer. I exercise my will and my will gives my thought the content and direction. I call this part of my thought conscious thought. By exercising my will or bringing my awareness to the present, I awaken my mind that was otherwise sleeping in the sea of unconscious thoughts.
I have come to an awareness then, when my mind is awake, it gives the content and direction to my thought on what to write and where to go with it. Each moment becomes a moment of reflection and observation so the flow of logical rhythm doesn’t break. While in this flow, my mind conjures up new ideas and insights. On the contrary, when my mind is asleep, I find myself doodling on the paper and filling it with my signature — and by no means is my signature remarkable.
I’m coming to a conclusion, then, that there are two parts of my mind — the sleeping mind and the conscious mind. I have also come to a second conclusion that it is the exercise of my will that wakes up the sleeping mind and gives direction and rhythm to the thoughts, so that I can truly call them mine.
Here, I ponder on another insight: does my mind give content and direction to my thoughts that are already there, or does it generate new thoughts? Do I, by the very act of conscious thinking, generate new thoughts that are unique to me? If so, what is this mind that I speak of? Is it some sort of a container that contains the vast sea of unconscious thoughts that flow in it, their origins unknown? Or, is it also a generator that generates new, conscious thoughts that have a logical flow and rhythm to them?
And if I call the mind a generator, should I, by analogy, call thoughts electricity? And what is it that we call consciousness? The most logical answer appears to be that the content of consciousness, or an important part of it, is thought — conscious and unconscious. I say a part of it because feeling, instinct and intuition are also parts of consciousness. And, if I call thoughts electricity, then I can, by reason and logic, call consciousness electricity.
And if the content that constitutes us — consciousness — is electricity, then there must be a source that generates it and precedes everything else. In poetic language, there must be a God Who created the Universe or the Multiverse and everything in it.
To quote from the Quran:
Allah is the Light of the heavens and the earth. The similitude of His light is as a niche wherein is a lamp. The lamp is in a glass. The glass is as it were a shining star. (This lamp is) kindled from a blessed tree, an olive neither of the East nor of the West, whose oil would almost glow forth (of itself) though no fire touched it. Light upon light. Allah guideth unto His light whom He will. And Allah speaketh to mankind in allegories, for Allah is Knower of all things.
— Quran (24:35)
At this point, I end this reverie.
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